As I sat in one of my classes today, I prayed the lyrics from the song "Hosanna" which read:
Break my heart for what breaks yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I wrote these words into my notes, I started sobbing. My professor for this class is one that I truly care about and I can just see that his heart is so opposed to the love of Christ. I do not think this is from lack of intelligence. This is a brilliant man whom I have come to respect and admire greatly. But his intense disdain for Christianity hurts. I am worried that I will not get to share eternity worshiping our creator with him and that he will be forever separated from God's love. I know that God's feelings in this matter are even stronger than mine, but sometimes I wish God would just soften hearts that I feel are impenetrable. I feel as though I suck at being a follower of Christ because I am not able to say something that inspires this professor to think differently. In fact, I rarely talk to him about these things because I just feel rejected before I even begin.
I know that God loves this professor even more than I do. I know that God is the one who softens the ground. I know that God will ultimately prevail. I am just so sad by the current state of affairs.